Taking it easy

The nice thing about ballplayers is they all get on the same page. They are consistent. They have a staple of tried-and-true clichés that they like to trot out in certain situations and they work. It's reasonable. Smart. Sometimes there is just nothing to say or anything to talk about.

After last night's loss to the Milwaukee Brewers, Shane Victorino rolled through the clubhouse on his way to the shower/training room/dining room when some media types asked him if they could ask him a few questions. But without breaking stride and offering just a short glance over his shoulder, Victorino gave the press the Heisman.

"I didn't do bleep," he said.

Uh, yeah... that's the point.

Nevertheless, the main problem for the 6-7 Phillies appears to have universal acceptance. It's history. The Phillies are notorious for their poor Aprils so why should it be any different this year? The problem this April is that the team just can't find its mojo. Every time they get going it rains, or there is a day off, or another ceremony. It makes it even more difficult for a team that finds comfort in the mundane and routine like the Phillies.

They are "rhythmatic."

But really - who complains about too many days off? Sure, the part about not being able to find a rhythm is understandable, but days off... really? In baseball? It's a long season as it is and the Phillies have 149 games and six months left to play, which means they better enjoy those off days now. Come September they might even be begging for a day off just to be able to set up the pitching rotation properly.

Hell, it won't take long for those off days to be few and far between. Starting today the Phillies play 17 games in 18 days with 10 of them at home and two in New York. If there was ever a time to start racking up some wins, it's now.

Better yet, the Phillies play 19 of their first 31 games at home. Wait until they get out on the road late in the season without off days or even the threat of rain on the horizon. Maybe then they'll remember April and the opportunity they had.

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This morning the train station was crowded with high school track teams making the way to Franklin Field for the first day of The Penn Relays. Today's action is mostly high school races before giving way to the traditional "distance night" when the some pretty good local runners will duke it out on the famous track.

But if you're looking for the big-time names at this year's relays, forget it - this is the year after the Olympics which sometimes means the big-timers lay low for a bit.

Still, the Penn Relays might be the best spectator sport festival in the city. It's very difficult not to get swept up in all the action so if you haven't been to Franklin Field to watch the races yet, get there. It's definitely one of those things every Philadelphian should see at least once.

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Last night the windows in the press box were closed down after the first inning as the wind and rain took over the region. Hey, it got cold... why should we be comfortable? This isn't 1865... we have electricity and indoor plumbing.

Nevertheless, when the windows began closing a few fans sitting in the proximity of the press box began heckling members of the local sporting press for being "wimps" or worse.

Can you believe it? Heckling the sensitive and delicate press corps?

How rude!

However, this morning I was alerted to the fact that a certain Phillies broadcaster also resorted to name-calling and tongue-clucking when the windows came down. That's his right, I suppose. Still, it seems a bit hypocritical that the same broadcaster came to sit in the warmth of the press box when he was neither on radio nor TV.

The nerve of that guy...

No pain, no gain

Below is a photo of Stanford runner Alicia Follmar, who took a hard fall in the Penn Relays women's collegiate distance medley race at Franklin Field yesterday. While on the ground after the fall, Follmar was spiked on the head, which probably didn't feel too great, either. Those spikes are sharp like needles and can cut through soda cans like those ginzu knives in the old TV commercials. Imagine what it must feel like to be trampled on the head by a shoe covered with ginzu knives... yeah, ouch!

Nevertheless, Follmar got up -- bloodied but unbowed -- and finished in third place, behind Tennessee and Michigan.

Alicia Follmar is much tougher than you.

photos from the Track & Field News

Geek alert

We're kind of into the whole endurance sport thing here at Finger Food World Headquarters in Lancaster, Pa., U.S.A. We're big fans of all of it and follow it the way most people get into football or baseball. Truth is, we such big running geeks that we can recite training logs of some of the sports top athletes for the weeks leading up to a big race. Like how Alberto Salazar raced Henry Rono in a 10k match race days before winning the '82 Boston in the famous "Duel in the Sun." Or how Brian Sell ran 10 in 52 the day before finishing third in last November's Olympic Trials. There are many reasons for our geekdom. For one thing, running, cycling, swimming and those types of things are the most egalitarian of all the sports. If a person want to be good at one of those sports, all he has to do is put in the work. Over time, the people who are consistent in working hard will get good results.

Guaranteed.

What I also like about those sports is you don't have to pass the ball. If a mistake is made, it's your own damn fault. No one has to worry about fielding errors or those types of annoyances.

Sure, there are errors in a race. For instance, over a decade ago I was in a 10k and running in second place well off the lead. Actually, the leader was so far ahead that I couldn't see him and there was no one within sight behind me either. I was in no-man's land... literally. But here's the thing - the leader had the local police leading the way with a pace car. All he had to do was follow the guide through the woods and hills of the course out in some nature preserve on the far northern edge of Lancaster County. Not only was the dude in the lead and winning easily, but also he had a tour guide.

Back in second place (or first loser) I'm grinding it out a hoping that every corner I turn is the last one. Finally, around 30 minutes into it I figure it's time to put down the hammer and run it in hard. Out there by myself I didn't know if anyone was gaining on me so I'm scared about losing second. But here's the funny part - there was no one out there to show me the way to the finish line. So running hard with eyes bulging and froth flying from my mouth, I missed the final right turn. Actually, the course wasn't marked so it wasn't like I missed the turn - the turn didn't exist.

About five minutes later I realized something was wrong, but I still worried that someone would catch me. So I kept hammering away and before I knew it I was somewhere in the woods of Lebanon County -- just running around and trying to find the finish line. It took another 30 minutes for me to find my way back to the car. So yeah, an error in running can cost another person a race.

Anyway, as endurance freaks this is a fun time of year. London, the Olympic Trials and Boston were piled on top of each other in successive weeks. That's like holding the conference championships and the Super Bowl without bye weeks with all the best athletes in the world in action.

Locally, the Penn Relays start today with the Olympic development 5 and 10 kilometer races set for tonight's Distance Night. The big-timers preparing to win gold in Beijing like 400-meter man Jeremy Wariner and sprinter Tyson Gay are in town for Saturday's marquee events.

Meanwhile, the road racing scene blasts into full gear, too. The always speedy Broad Street Run is next weekend, as well as a ton of smaller, local races. That goes for the multi-sport set, too. In fact, one-time Phillie Jeff Conine has joined our ranks as an endurance geek. After finally retiring from the Major Leagues, Conine has jumped into the triathlon and even got a special waiver to compete in October's Hawaiian Ironman.

Frankly, I think he should qualify like a real athlete, but you know, Major Leaguers often have special entitlements.

Anyway, Conine's new hobby was chronicled by The New York Times this week.

There is nothing like warming up for a marathon with a long swim and bike ride, huh?

Speaking of qualifying for big races, there was another story in The Times about the lengths people go to get into the Boston Marathon and why, as Gina Kolota writes, "Why is it so hard to enter?"

Here it is:

It isn't hard to enter the Boston Marathon. The fact is the qualifying standards are a little too fair. Soft, actually. Boston is good because it's supposedly difficult to get into. There should be standards sometimes.

Look, our sport is easy - if a person want to be good, all he has to do is put in the work. Over time, the people who are consistent in working hard will get good results. Even Jeff Conine.

Guaranteed.